It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
