Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
