i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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