Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
