I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
