You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
