You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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