it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize