Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
