Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
