He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
