This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
