I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
