If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize