The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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