To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
i just google imaged poop.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize