You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
