on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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