their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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