No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
