I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Quick, to the slutcave!
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
