Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
