too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
