Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
