i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
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