Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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