Don't you send me to vm
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
