i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
