Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
You're a waste of cheezeits
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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