so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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