Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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