Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
