Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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