I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize
