i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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