i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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