Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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