Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
