So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Randomize
