you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
