is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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