I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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