I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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