He is an equal opportunity slut.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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