I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
