A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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