if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
