I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Randomize
