Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
