Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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