We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
